How to Use This Worksheet: Responsibility Pie

This worksheet helps you look at a situation that causes guilt or shame and see it more realistically. When we feel bad about something, we often take on too much responsibility or overlook other factors that played a role. By breaking down who or what contributed, you can develop a more balanced and compassionate view.

 

Step 1: Describe the Event

• Think of something that happened that still brings up guilt or shame.

• Keep it brief and factual.

• Example: “I missed an important deadline at work.”

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Step 2: List Contributing Factors

• Write down all the people or circumstances that played a part in what happened — including yourself, others, and external factors (like stress, timing, or unclear expectations).

• Example: “Myself,” “my supervisor’s unclear instructions,” “tight timeline,” “unexpected illness.”

 

Step 3: Create the Responsibility Pie

• On the pie chart, assign a “slice” of the pie to each person or factor based on how responsible you think they were.

• Make sure the total adds up to 100%.

• Example: Myself – 40%, Supervisor – 30%, Timeline – 20%, Illness – 10%.

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Step 4: Reflect on Your Slice

• Look at how big your portion of the pie is. Does it seem fair, or are you taking too much (or too little) responsibility?

• Ask yourself:

  • “What was truly within my control?”

  • “What wasn’t?”

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Step 5: Take Balanced Responsibility

• In the space provided, write how you can take appropriate responsibility for your part without blaming yourself for things that were beyond your control.

• Example: “I can plan better next time, but I’m not responsible for the last-minute changes.”

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Tip: This exercise isn’t about avoiding responsibility — it’s about seeing the full picture. When you recognize what was and wasn’t yours to carry, it becomes easier to forgive yourself, learn, and move forward.